Just checking in....

[dsf618]

Bernie has now been gone 18 days - seems like an eternity. I hate being here on the farm alone - Jim goes to his friend (that is how he is dealing with the loss)and Robbyn insists on going to school every day. Cleo the basset hound is here to keep me company (Bernie knew I would need someone to be here for me).

I have sewed together the 6 inch Christmas charms that we swapped 2-3 years ago. It has made a pretty quilt top that measures 84 x 109. Was fairly easy and I did not have to think too much! LOL! Now I am working on the red and white maple leaves for our wedding quilt.

I guess I am doing OK. I need to figure out a new normal. I haven't had normal since March, 2010 when Marty got sick and certainly nothing was normal with Bernie! Am taking it one day at a time and going from there.

Thank you all for your prayers and thoughts and beautiful cards. They mean so much to me.

Deb

[Ittybittygma]

Oh Deb, I am so sorry to hear that Bernie is gone! I haven't been on everyday and never saw any post about him. I am sitting here in shock and fighting tears for you, my dear friend. You have been thru so much, more than lots of folks face in a lifetime and you went thru it twice in a few short yrs.

I don't know what to say. Wish I could just be there with you, as a friend, as a helper, just as somebody to be at your side and help you bear this heavy heavy burden on your heart and indeed on your very soul.

I would sit with you and hold your hand or you, and give you a shoulder to lean on, or to cry on, an ear to listen as your pour out your tears, and your sadness. I would hope I could offer a gentle word, a caring hug. a bit of my own strength and faith to offer some comfort in the midst of so great a sorrow.

May God be with you and send angels of support for some sense of peace and comfort when there doesn't seem to be any. May you be surrounded with many angels of support, hugs, and help where you need it. Do you have any family or close friends that you can turn to or talk to or just be with once in awhile?

Please ask about a grief support group in your area or your church. Just being around others who share the sorrows of losing a spouse may at least ease some of your feeling so alone in this situation.

Come here anytime and just "talk to us". Talking or writing might just help to ease a little of the pain. We all handle grief in different ways and different time tables. Take time to grieve but also take time to share that grief and also your happy memories with your children and your family or even with us. We are here for you anytime you need us. Is there anything we can do for you besides pray and send our bestest hugs across the miles?

Again, Deb, I am so very sorry I didn't know this earlier. You have my deepest sympathy. Please keep posting so we know that you are ok. Give your children a hug too. So much to bear on all of you. Much love and more hugs, Shirley Mae

[dsf618]

I just want the pain and hurting to go away....

[purrfect-lady]

Deb, I'm so sorry to hear that you've lost your Bernie. But I've told you my story, and I KNOW, that once you've walked this path, you will have no regrets, and there is a new life ahead of you. But for now, I know how you miss Bernie, and I hope you are able to focus, instead, on the blessing that he was in your life. God bless you. Mary

[MainelyMe]

Oh dear, I am so sorry to read about your great loss. I cannot say I known what you are going through, but want you to know I do care. Take it slow, and give yourself time to grieve and hopefully all of you will help each other through the process.
I will keep you in my prayers, and send one up for Bernie too.
Take care and know we are here when you need us.
Joan

[WeSignificant]

My thoughts and prayers are with you during your time of sorrow. Know that we have big shoulders for you and this is surely a place you come to express your thoughts, but also to find strength and encouragement when you need it.

May God walk beside you as you begin your new journey in life. I know there is a plan for you and you will understand why God has burdened you with this. Peace be with you

[scrapquilter48]

dsf, I didn't get to read the news wire, Bernie I gather is/was your husband.. And you lost him suddenly, tragically.. Please tell me what happened if you want..

I've been with proper internet service middle January, therefore missed a lot of your happenings..

[fabricgirl]

Deb so sorry for your Loss I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

Lois

[Marilynsgrammy]

Deb, I think making that maple leaf quilt will be good therapy for you... maybe with each leaf you could write down your feelings... then when you are done with the quilt top all the thoughts will be in one place... you could either save them or send them to Bernie in a prayer..

God Bless you,

Chriss

[SusieQ51]

I have tears in my eyes as I read your posting. While my DH is still with me, his health is so fragile that each day is a blessing. Thank God you have sewing as a source of comfort for you. Just know that all of us are here for you to cry with, laugh with, rant to, and just read quietly our postings.

Take care!
Diana in Indiana