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Dog's pet peeves
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cindyg
- Posts: 21740
- Joined: Mon Feb 05, 2007 10:04 am
Dog's pet peeves
10 Pet Peeves that Dogs have about Humans ...
Ten Peeves that Dogs Have About Humans
'1'
Blaming your farts on me....
not funny... not funny at all !!!
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'2'
Yelling at me for barking.
I'M A FRIGGIN' DOG, YOU IDIOT!
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'3'
Taking me for a walk, then
not letting me check stuff out.
Exactly whose walk is this anyway?
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'4'
Any trick that involves balancing
food on my nose. Stop it!
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'5'
Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons.
Now you know why we chew your stuff
up when you're not home.
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'6'
The sleight of hand, fake fetch throw.
You fooled a dog! Whoooo Hoooooooo what
a proud moment for the top of the food chain.
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'7'
Taking me to the vet for "the big snip",
then acting surprised when I freak
out every time we go back!
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'8'
Getting upset when I sniff the crotches of your guests.
Sorry, but I haven't quite mastered that handshake thing yet.
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'9'
Dog sweaters. Hello ???
Haven't you noticed the fur?
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'10'
How you act disgusted when I lick myself.
Look, we both know the truth. You're just jealous.
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Now lay off me on some of these things.
We both know who's boss here!
You don't see me picking up your poop do you?
EVERY DOG HAS HIS DAY.
A DOG ALWAYS OFFERS UNCONDITIONAL LOVE.
CATS HAVE TO THINK ABOUT IT!
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QIAD-Linda
- Posts: 9901
- Joined: Wed Dec 20, 2006 11:16 am
Re: Dog's pet peeves
lol, these are great! I sure needed a laugh, thanks for posting it.
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cindyg
- Posts: 21740
- Joined: Mon Feb 05, 2007 10:04 am
Re: Dog's pet peeves
This had some cute pictures with it but they didn't show up. I tried.
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quilterbee
- Posts: 5493
- Joined: Wed Jan 24, 2007 6:06 am
Re: Dog's pet peeves
That is freaking hilarious!!! Love it! Amie :oD
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notaquiltsnob
- Posts: 136
- Joined: Mon Jan 15, 2007 4:56 pm
Re: Dog's pet peeves
That is soooooooooooooofunny. LOL
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Tiggersmom
- Posts: 4104
- Joined: Fri Jan 05, 2007 4:44 pm
Re: Dog's pet peeves
I sure hope Iowagal sees this!! LOL
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SewGlad
- Posts: 9158
- Joined: Sun Apr 01, 2007 2:00 am
Re: Dog's pet peeves
love it, love it, love it
Ruthie
Ruthie
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Cathy32078
- Posts: 17499
- Joined: Sun Feb 25, 2007 6:36 am
Re: Dog's pet peeves
ROFLOL These are fantastic!!! LOL Thank You!
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IowaGal
- Posts: 3638
- Joined: Wed Jan 31, 2007 1:47 am
Re: Dog's pet peeves
Dear God: Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another?
Dear God: When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it still the same old story?
Dear God: Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around? We do love a nice ride! Would it be so hard to rename the "Chrysler Eagle" the " Chrysler Beagle"?
Dear God: If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is he still a bad dog?
Dear God: We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?
Dear God: More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.
Dear God: Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize?
Dear God: Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must remember to be a good dog.
1 . I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or after they throw it up.
2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell.
3. The Litter Box is not a cookie jar.
4. The sofa is not a 'face towel'.
5. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.
6. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet.
7. Sticking my nose into someone's crotch is an unacceptable way of saying "hello".
8. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm under the coffee table.
9. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house - not after.
10. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt.
11. I will not sit in the middle of the living room and lick my crotch.
12. The cat is not a 'squeaky toy' so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing.
P.S. Dear God: When I get to Heaven may I have my testicles back?
Dear God: When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it still the same old story?
Dear God: Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around? We do love a nice ride! Would it be so hard to rename the "Chrysler Eagle" the " Chrysler Beagle"?
Dear God: If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is he still a bad dog?
Dear God: We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?
Dear God: More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.
Dear God: Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize?
Dear God: Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must remember to be a good dog.
1 . I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or after they throw it up.
2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell.
3. The Litter Box is not a cookie jar.
4. The sofa is not a 'face towel'.
5. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.
6. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet.
7. Sticking my nose into someone's crotch is an unacceptable way of saying "hello".
8. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm under the coffee table.
9. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house - not after.
10. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt.
11. I will not sit in the middle of the living room and lick my crotch.
12. The cat is not a 'squeaky toy' so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing.
P.S. Dear God: When I get to Heaven may I have my testicles back?
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missmarcia
- Posts: 166
- Joined: Mon Apr 30, 2007 11:03 am
Re: Dog's pet peeves
So funny.....love it all.